Diary Entry August 5, 2025

Camp Chaos: A Nature Adventure”

Dear Diary,

Today I went camping.
That’s right. Tents. Fire. Bugs. No WiFi.

I was told it would be peaceful. Grounding. "A great way to unplug."
What they failed to mention: you cannot microwave beard balm in the woods.

Here’s how it went:

⛺ I attempted to set up my tent using soap twine and sheer willpower. It immediately collapsed. Twice. I now live under a tarp and bad decisions.

🔥 I tried to roast a marshmallow, but it slipped off the stick and I screamed like I’d lost a bar of limited-edition soap. Tragic.

🐛 A beetle crawled across my sleeping bag, so I offered it a mica sample in exchange for going away. It declined.

🍄 I found a weird mushroom and tried to name it “Lather Shroom Supreme.” No one was impressed.

🧼 I did manage to bathe in a freezing creek using one of my sample soaps — and now the entire forest smells like citrus and ambition.

Anyway, I’m cold, slightly sticky, and 74% sure I’m being followed by a raccoon who wants my snacks.
10/10 experience. Would do again. With glitter bear spray.

Pitching tents & making scents,
Melinda 🐒💜