Diary Entry August 4, 2025

Productive? No. Sticky? Yes.

Dear Diary,

Today started with the best of intentions. I woke up early, put on my lab coat (it’s a dish towel with a name tag), and declared, “Let’s make beard balm like responsible grown-ups!”

Five minutes later I was licking the immersion blender.

To be clear: it smelled delicious.
To be even more clear: it did not taste like a cupcake.

I tried to recover by measuring ingredients, but got distracted halfway through and started sorting carrier oils by “vibe” instead of viscosity. Then I labeled a tin “Hair Paste for Pirates” and honestly? It felt right.

At one point I slipped on arrowroot powder and knocked over a bag of mica. The explosion was fabulous. I looked like a disco ball with regrets.

End result?

One new batch of beard balm ✅

Three mislabeled tins ❓

Two glittery eyebrows I did not have this morning ✨

All in all, I call it a win.

Lathered in ambition and beeswax,
Melinda 🐒💜